Starting a Family With the Perfect Partner: Matchmaking Tips

Starting a Family With the Perfect Partner: Matchmaking Tips

Ready to Start a Family?  How to Find Your Perfect Partner  

Starting a family with another person is one of life’s most profound, shared journeys.   While it can be filled with love and joy, it can also be daunting. Finding the right partner for long-term happiness and stability is not just about a romantic connection, it is about shared goals, values, and visions for the future.  At Searchmate, many of our members are ready to think about starting a family with the right partner. 

Understand Your Values 

It is vital to understand your own values when thinking about a long-term commitment.  What qualities are you looking for in a life partner?  What are your deal breakers and are they realistic?  Clarify for yourself what are essential qualities and what things you may be willing to compromise on for lasting love with the right person.  


It is crucial to be open and honest when hoping to find a partner to start a family with.  Conversations about your expectations, desires and fears regarding parenthood are key – you may have surprisingly different views. 

Emotional Compatibility  

Family life with all its highs and lows can be emotionally challenging.  It is important to find a partner who is capable of providing love, support and understanding during the good times and the bad.  Avoid emotionally immature potential partners who struggle with commitment and/or communication.  

Take Your Time 

Take time to get to know a potential life partner.  The start of a promising new relationship is always exciting but have patience and make informed decisions. 

If you are ready to find someone who loves and respects you, and who is committed to building a happy and healthy family together, our friendly Membership Advisers at Searchmate will be very happy to share an informal chat to explain how we can help find your perfect partner! Our personal matchmakers are dedicated to providing you with a first-rate, tailored matchmaking experience, and competitively priced membership packages. 

Essential Qualities Men Seek in Long-Term Relationships | Matchmaking Insights

Essential Qualities Men Seek in Long-Term Relationships | Matchmaking Insights

Many stereotypes exist about the differing needs of men and women in a relationship. It might surprise you to know that both genders are seeking many of the same qualities on their journey to find long-lasting love. Let us explain: 

Communication and Empathy 

Men value honest communication in a relationship. Without an honest and open approach, emotional intimacy and depth cannot be achieved. Relationships grow when ideas and emotions can freely be exchanged. Couples should feel safe to express their feelings. At Searchmate, our matchmaking experts can provide coaching to help guide these feelings. 

Value and Respect 

Feeling valued and respected develops a sense of worth within a relationship. Like women, men like to feel that their strengths are acknowledged and appreciated. When we feel ‘seen’, positivity and support become part of the relationship dynamic. Our matchmakers will always try to match you with like minded individuals who share the same values. 

An Emotional Connection 

Men crave connection on an emotional level. An Introductions agency will help guide emotional intimacy, which can help matches to share their hopes, dreams and fears. It encourages honesty and allows issues to be confronted before they spiral. 

Shared Values & Goals 

In order to work towards a future together, it is important that there is a foundation of shared values and goals. Men look for an aligned sense of unity and purpose with a potential, long-term partner. Searchmate is a traditional dating company that looks to pair partners based on compatibility to increase the likelihood of long-lasting relationships. 

Loyalty and Trust 

Men value loyalty and trust within a relationship. A sense of security and stability contributes greatly to a healthy relationship. Personal matchmaking encourages both of these virtues to promote successful connections. 

Personal Space 

For many men, personal space is important. An independent woman who respects her partner’s need for space will keep her own sense of identity, and allow her partner to retain his. This mutual understanding is key for harnessing a healthy relationship. 

Physical Intimacy 

Physical intimacy is often a vital aspect of a romantic relationship for men. In addition to physical pleasure, it provides a way of expressing love and closeness. Traditional matchmaking agencies carefully assess matches to ensure individuals have similar preferences. 

A Sense of Humour 

Men appreciate a partner with a shared sense of humour. Laughter develops positivity and closeness between two people. Openness is fundamental for nurturing trust and comfort in a loving relationship. 

In conclusion, in order to understand what men truly want in relationships, it is important to look beyond stereotypes. Men are looking for genuine connections, intimacy and mutual support, just as women are. Lasting relationships are built on clear communication, trust, respect and shared goals and values. Reach out to our friendly advisers today to learn more about matchmaking, and how our dating coaches at Searchmate can help you to find your perfect partner.

Our Differentiators 

Our Differentiators 

Personal Matchmaking v Online Dating/Dating Apps  

We are often asked how working with a Personal Matchmaker differs from dating online or via a smartphone app. So we felt it would be worthwhile to have a closer look at that subject as many people, particularly those under 45,, have grown up with internet-based dating and may not even realise that there is a well-established and highly credible alternative to it  in Personal Matchmaking.  

Personal matchmaking has been around for centuries and could be the source of a higher quality partner than you may be able to obtain online and also give you a better chance of success, by working with your own dating expert, rather than tackling your search alone. But is often said to be ‘the best kept secret in dating’.   

First a little bit of history on dating, as the very first professional dating agency ‘The Matrimonial Bureau’ first opened its doors in London in the early part of the 18th century around 1705, incredibly even before the United Kingdom had come into existence in 1707. Dating and introductions can actually be traced back even earlier to around 1650, when Mr Robinson first began to introduce people as part of his ‘Citizens Advice Bureau’, charging according to a sliding scale of a person’s wealth. So, dating activity in the U.K. has been established for centuries.  

Dating boomed, particularly in the USA after the First World War and in 1930’s London, Heather Jenner and Mary Oliver established a further London Bureau in Bond Street, which was the forerunner of modern dating in the UK today. Way before the internet dating revolution began in the mid to late 1990’s.  

The big difference between the two is the emphasis on the word ‘personal’ in Personal Matchmaking, which is a strong clue that you are working with an expert to help you identify and introduce you to potential partners, rather than it being something, you do alone on your PC, laptop or smartphone at home. With the end result that better results and possibly higher quality matches can come from working with your own expert personal matchmaker, rather than going it alone.  

Most personal matchmaking companies are smaller and will cost more, because of you employing an expert to assist you. But as a consequence, you will find that usually your matchmaker will know the individuals that are part of the agency and most will have been met and personally interviewed, which is something that an online agency could probably never hope to emulate. You could therefore usually expect quality and results to be better, although there could never be a guarantee of that, as no one knows where chemistry may be found.  

If you are unsure about the differences, or your best options, we are happy to offer free advice and offer the chance to ask questions to one of our Membership Advisers. This can be by email, text message, WhatsApp, by telephone or in person at our office. This advice is never charged for and there is no obligation to join afterwards. Our telephones are answered in the UK between 9am and 9pm every day and are all free to use.  

The Differences

Personal MatchmakingOnline Dating/Dating Apps
Expert help available YESNO
Personal serviceYESNO
High level confidentialityYESNO
High priority matchesYESNO
All members interviewedYESNO
In house vettingYESNO
Home visits availableYESNO
Office visits & interviewsYESNO
Choice of membershipsYESNO
Covers all of the UKYESNO
Photographs on every profileYESNO
Photography service offeredYESNO
Frequent ReviewsYESNO
Guaranteed matches optionYESNO
Freeze facilityYESNO
Dating events optionYESSOME
Coaching optionsYESNO
Free membership adviceYESNO
Why The Coronavirus Crisis Is Reminding Us How To Be Human

Why The Coronavirus Crisis Is Reminding Us How To Be Human

Why The Coronavirus Has Caused Us To Swap ‘FOMO’ For ‘EMOL’

Think back to a time when the world looked very different. A social anxiety known as ‘fear of missing out’ (FOMO) had become acknowledged as a real thing. FOMO sufferers felt a need to continuously stay connected to what other people were doing. As a result, real-life families, friends and couples were becoming distanced from each other. It was what ‘other people’ were doing that held real interest. This was a time when social media, and not the coronavirus, held all the power. This was the mental and emotional distancing of ourselves from those close to us.

Fast forward to now and the truth is, ‘other people’ really aren’t doing very much at all. The celebrities we once watched travelling the world are now reduced to trying to make their back gardens look enviable. Most of us are realising that, actually, we’re much happier focusing on our own lives and our own loved ones. Any-one with any sense is replacing FOMO for EMOL (Enjoying My Own Life).

“The Thrills and Spills Have Gone”

Genuine closeness and understanding from the ‘real people’ in our lives now means everything. When Amanda Holden uploaded a picture of herself mowing the lawn in her wedding dress, as an attempt to gain attention from her ‘followers’, many of us felt nothing but pity. It’s hard to pretend we’re anything that we’re not when on 24 hour lock-down with our loved ones. The thrills and spills have gone. Relationships are about patience, kindness and a willingness to be someone else’s safe place. We’re grateful for the new routines and rituals our loved ones have helped us to form. We’re grateful that someone still finds us endearing, even when they can’t escape us.

The only contact we have with strangers are meetings of empathetic eyes above a face-mask in a supermarket queue. Silently, afraid to breathe the same air, we reassure others that ‘We’re in this together’. And then, dart away as quickly as possible. However, the joy these simple smiles bring, from people we’d never have looked up from our phones for before, reminds us that whatever restrictions the coronavirus crisis imposes upon us, we share the same hopes. We all want everyone to be okay. And, we want to come out of this treasuring the one irreplaceable thing we were on the verge of losing: the joy of being human. This is not a time to watch other people live their lives. It’s about working out how to let authentic love, in all its forms, into our own lives.

Our experienced and friendly membership advisers are available to share an informal chat about how finding love during this time of uncertainty is still possible.

No Valentine’s Card This Year?

No Valentine’s Card This Year?

No Valentine’s Card This Year?

No Valentine’s card this year? It certainly is disappointing if that hoped for card or gift didn’t materialise, especially if you started the year so positively believing that 2017 was going to be THE year for you in terms of love and meeting that special person. St Valentine’s Day is very much a barometer, 6 weeks into the new year, when you can check out those aspirations you have for love and romance coming into your life and assess how you are doing so far.

If you aren’t happy with the progress you are making to date, then perhaps you will feel it is the right time to become more proactive. Most of the 16 million singles in the UK are now quite comfortable about using a professional, third party company to find love and Searchmate is one of the most popular.

We have been around since 1998 and are one of the established Personal Matchmaking services in the country, we also truly cover the country, which is unusual in Personal Matchmaking. Searchmate caters for attractive, professional people from all walks of life, so a Personal Introductions or Dating Agency for nice people from the right sort of background, in other words one of the best and most successful dating brands in the UK.

We have one of the largest data bases in the country, almost all of whom are professionals or aspiring professionals, who have been personally interviewed, ID checked and vetted – to absolutely ensure that they are who they say they are. We also support the dating safety guidelines advocated by the Dating Agency Association.

Is that for you?   Well we’d love to put you in an informed position so that you could decide yourself. If you’d like to know about Searchmate and how we work, then why not call Julie, our Senior Membership Adviser/Dating Expert,  at our expense on 0800 644 4160 or complete out contact form by clicking here and we’ll call you back, usually within 24 working hours

We hope to hear from you soon.

Our Dating Safely Campaign Launch

Our Dating Safely Campaign Launch

Our Dating Safety Campaign Launch

Searchmate Ltd is delighted to support the Dating Agency Association’s Dating Safely Campaign launch, it is especially appropriate with today being St Valentine’s Day, which has been associated with love and romance now for many centuries. Finding new partners should be fun and part of an exciting journey that you take within your life, it is however important to take steps to ensure you stay safe, both your personal safety but also safety from scammers and online dating fraudsters. Searchmate announces our Dating Safely Campaign launch and fully supports the efforts that the Dating Agency Association have taken to highlight safer dating. Here is their press release:

Industry Body for UK Dating Agencies Announces Launch of National Dating Safely Campaign

Campaign Set to Save Lives Will ‘Go Live’ on 13th February 2017. 

13th February 2017 – The industry body for UK dating agencies, The Dating Agency Association, has announced that its national Dating Safely Campaign will go live on February 13th, 2017, providing free information to single people, and clear professional guidelines to dating agencies, in order to promote a cultural shift in the way we think about personal safety.

On the 15th January 2017, eighteen year old, Leonne Weeks – ‘a quiet girl, who wouldn’t hurt anybody’ – was found dead in an isolated pathway in Rotherham, South Yorks. Police are scouring social media for clues after friends said that Leanne had gone to meet a man from a dating site.  A teenage boy has been charged with her murder.

While Leonne’s devastated family await answers, this young woman’s death is a stark reminder of how meeting strangers online has become commonplace within our society.  Men and women of all ages are putting themselves at risk every day across the UK as a result of new and dangerous attitudes to dating.

In the tragic case of Usha Patel – a forty-four year old mother who was brutally murdered by a man she invited to her home – having connected via an online dating agency – Judge Rebecca Poulet QC said: “In my assessment, this case is a stark warning to anyone who plans to meet someone following limited internet contact.  That meeting must take place in a public place until one person feels they know something of the other.”

Usha Patel’s five-year-old son discovered his mother’s body the morning after the vicious and bloody attack, having been left alone with her overnight. Judge Rebecca Poulet concluded – “She (Patel) was clearly anxious to meet a new partner, but she paid for this invitation with her life.”

The Dating Agency Association has set out clear guidelines for both single people, and dating agencies across the country, to ensure that the very human desire to find love no longer leaves single people vulnerable to exploitation and violence.

Dating Expert and Self-Help author, Trelawney Kerrigan, has worked closely with The Dating Agency Association, safety professionals, UK charities, and a diverse group of single people, to devise a set of simple guidelines aimed at saving lives.  The Dating Safely Guidelines handbook can be downloaded free of charge via the Dating Agency Association website

A hard copy of the handbook can also be requested via the website.

Trelawney Kerrigan said: “The frightening conclusion to my research is that the anonymity of dating apps and online sites has bought with it increasingly dangerous attitudes towards meeting complete strangers in isolated settings – blinded by the instant intimacy of online communication.  Importantly this is not a behaviour limited to young people: men and women of all ages are trading the basic safeguarding of their lives for instant gratification.”

Tina Wallace, the Chief Executive of the Dating Agency Association, is thrilled that all Dating Agency Association member agencies must now commit to implementing clear policies and procedures that promote a safe and transparent environment on behalf of their clients. Tina Wallace said:  “Our Dating Safely Guidelines handbook provides simple common sense advice to single people, ensuring that they consider their own well being and put personal safety first when seeking a relationship.