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Why The Coronavirus Crisis Is Reminding Us How To Be Human

Why The Coronavirus Crisis Is Reminding Us How To Be Human

Why The Coronavirus Has Caused Us To Swap ‘FOMO’ For ‘EMOL’

Think back to a time when the world looked very different. A social anxiety known as ‘fear of missing out’ (FOMO) had become acknowledged as a real thing. FOMO sufferers felt a need to continuously stay connected to what other people were doing. As a result, real-life families, friends and couples were becoming distanced from each other. It was what ‘other people’ were doing that held real interest. This was a time when social media, and not the coronavirus, held all the power. This was the mental and emotional distancing of ourselves from those close to us.

Fast forward to now and the truth is, ‘other people’ really aren’t doing very much at all. The celebrities we once watched travelling the world are now reduced to trying to make their back gardens look enviable. Most of us are realising that, actually, we’re much happier focusing on our own lives and our own loved ones. Any-one with any sense is replacing FOMO for EMOL (Enjoying My Own Life).

“The Thrills and Spills Have Gone”

Genuine closeness and understanding from the ‘real people’ in our lives now means everything. When Amanda Holden uploaded a picture of herself mowing the lawn in her wedding dress, as an attempt to gain attention from her ‘followers’, many of us felt nothing but pity. It’s hard to pretend we’re anything that we’re not when on 24 hour lock-down with our loved ones. The thrills and spills have gone. Relationships are about patience, kindness and a willingness to be someone else’s safe place. We’re grateful for the new routines and rituals our loved ones have helped us to form. We’re grateful that someone still finds us endearing, even when they can’t escape us.

The only contact we have with strangers are meetings of empathetic eyes above a face-mask in a supermarket queue. Silently, afraid to breathe the same air, we reassure others that ‘We’re in this together’. And then, dart away as quickly as possible. However, the joy these simple smiles bring, from people we’d never have looked up from our phones for before, reminds us that whatever restrictions the coronavirus crisis imposes upon us, we share the same hopes. We all want everyone to be okay. And, we want to come out of this treasuring the one irreplaceable thing we were on the verge of losing: the joy of being human. This is not a time to watch other people live their lives. It’s about working out how to let authentic love, in all its forms, into our own lives.

Our experienced and friendly membership advisers are available to share an informal chat about how finding love during this time of uncertainty is still possible.

Loneliness – dealing with an epidemic of it in the UK

Loneliness – dealing with an epidemic of it in the UK

Loneliness has the same effect on health as smoking 15 cigarettes a day!

Loneliness is a problem blighting more and more people in the UK, particularly those in mid life and beyond.

In days gone by, it might well have been a subject that we shied away from and hoped it would always be something that affected others rather than oneself, but as divorce rates soar over the last decade or so maybe it is something that we ought to think of and tackle rather than letting this debilitating problem creep up on us gradually. 

New figures published by the Office for National Statistics confirm that we are in the grip of a loneliness epidemic, with poor health and the loss of a loved one both playing a major part in this troubling social phenomenon. It is said to be as harmful to our health as smoking 15 cigarettes a day, this epidemic is also contributing significantly to the incidence of depression and dementia in older age groups and is more prevalent among women than men, but undoubtedly is a significant problem to both sexes.

Laura Ferguson, director of the Campaign to End Loneliness, believes feelings of isolation are more dangerous than many of us realise, given the serious health consequences.

Loneliness has been linked to depression and dementia, stroke and cardiovascular disease, stress, disturbed sleep, decreased memory and learning, and the progression of Alzheimer’s disease as we get older. And the sad thing is we could do something about the problem if we wanted to and were prepared to make the right sort of effort to strike back.

Initiatives do exist to try to arrest this increasingly big problem. A new charity funded through the Big Lottery Fund have, for example, awarded £70 million to projects designed to improve the lives of older people. Known as Fulfilling Lives: Ageing Better, it distributes grants to charities and organisations to help tackle loneliness and enhance the lives of the silver generation.

Individuals are also helping themselves in greater numbers, determined to use the freedom of mid life or retirement to forge a bold new path, meet new people and develop new interests, particularly after divorce or becoming a widow or widower.

There has been a significant boom in dating for older age groups too, 60 (and beyond) now feels like the new 40 in dating and personal introductions circles and at Searchmate Introductions we can make a contribution to the cause to end loneliness. Meeting new people in your 50’s and 60’s has never been so popular. Online Dating has been a massive success story in recent years with up to 16 million people using dating and introductory services of one kind or another but we know it’s not for everybody.

If you want to meet that perfect partner but don’t want the risks of meeting undesirables, or problem individuals through an online site, then Searchmate Introductions could be perfect for you.

All of our members are interviewed and thoroughly vetted before they are allowed to join as a member – almost unique in the UK these days, where no background checks are required by law.

So you can join us with confidence and our initial interview and advice is always free.

For more information email us at [email protected] or phone us for free on 0800 466 4160 and we’d be delighted to talk through how we can help.

Or click here to join immediately.

Our sister company When the Music Stops also offers quality dating services in terms of events and gatherings around the UK, such as Dinner Parties, Country Walks, Black Tie Events, Speed Dating, Weekend Breaks and Singles Holidays. Visit the When the Music Stops site for more details by clicking here.