I recently read an article in the Daily Telegraph looking at the problems surrounding dating in the 21st century. It pointed out how people are increasingly constructing two identities – their online and their offline identity. Because of the way people now communicate through social media sites and the rise of online dating there is often a gap between our actual selves – who we really are and the people who we think others want us to be or, worse still, the person we would like others to believe we are.
If you are looking for a partner to share your life with honest face to face communication is key, you want to know that person is also genuinely looking for someone and that the persona they are projecting is the true one.
This week I have spoken to two new clients who came to Searchmate for help with finding a life partner because of their experiences with online dating. Whilst neither had suffered a serious trauma they had come to the conclusion that online was not the way for them to find the special person they are seeking.
Because of the way we match and introduce our members to each other, and the way we guide them through the whole process, we are taking much of the stress out of the situation. We recommend several telephone conversations before a first date and when people do meet they often feel that they are already on a second or third date anyway.
At Searchmate we all believe in the traditional idea of matchmaking, which is hundreds if not thousands of years old and still works today. We truly want for our clients what they want for themselves and our “Happy Couples” prove that we achieve this.
I doubt if online dating will have the same shelf life.