For both single men and women, understanding what makes the opposite sex tick can seem like an impossible mission. Just when we think we’ve got a new partner all worked out, we do something that seems to throw them off balance. Suddenly, we’re alone on a Saturday night again. We’re logging onto a dating site. Trawling through hundreds of depressing strangers. It’s like sifting for gold without a panning sieve.
At Searchmate, our personal matchmakers become the panning sieve for our clients. It’s essential that we understand exactly what each client is looking for. As a result, we are uniquely placed to understand what single men and women want.
So What Do Single Men Want from a Relationship?
- Ease: When a man takes a woman on a first date, he wants to feel the uncomplicated anticipation of his adolescence. He wants to experience the excitement. The not-knowing-what-might-happen. The thrill of having a woman he finds attractive sitting opposite him. A sure way to kill this vibe is for a woman to start talking about an ex. A bitter break up. The terrible internet date she went on last week. Save the trash talking for a girls night. If your date is worth your time, he’ll want to feel that he’s making you feel special. And that you are open to exploring something new with a fresh and relaxed attitude.
- Connection: Women always underestimate how important a genuine connection is to a guy. It’s easy to dismiss men as shallow. The truth is very different. When a single guy talks about the kind of woman he is looking for in terms of a committed relationship, he’s looking for someone engaging, bright and funny. He wants to find a best friend and a lover. Just like you do. If you want a first date to turn into a second, third, fourth…be yourself.
- Trust: When a single guy pictures himself in a long-term relationship, it’s the loss of freedom that can cause anxiety. Not freedom to sleep with other women. Or freedom to stay out until the early hours in dodgy bars. It’s the freedom to retain friendships, hobbies, family ties, career goals. The great thing is, most women want that kind of freedom too. So it’s a win-win for couples who allow each other to breath.
- Attraction: Let’s be honest. Women like a man to take care of himself. They want to feel attracted to a date. No-one wants a guy who turns up for a date looking as though he doesn’t care about himself, let alone anyone else. It’s exactly the same for men. Yes, beauty is only skin deep, but the easy glow of someone who has taken time to feel good themselves radiates a feel good factor. It’s not superficial for a man to want to fancy a partner like crazy. Women want that too.
- Understanding: The fundamental quality that all men are looking for in a woman is understanding. We all want to be blessed with a partner who ‘gets’ us. Relationships work best when two people put real effort into understanding and enriching each other’s lives. They modify behaviours that need to change – without needing to be told – simply because they understand what the other needs. This doesn’t happen overnight. It’s a process that takes time and patience. Hang in there: acceptance is the most valuable gift human beings can exchange.
For more information about Searchmate’s personal matchmaking service, please call Senior Membership Adviser, Julie, on 0800 644 4160 9am – 9pm Every Day
