Have you all read ‘The New Rules’ by Ellen Fein and Sherrie Schneider?
This is a follow up to the nineties dating bible ‘The Rules’ but after the advent of the internet revolution and it’s a great read.
I’m not sure all of the recommendations are being followed however, so here’s a brief summary, if you want to enjoy dating success:
1) Never text, email or Facebook a man first
‘The premise of The Rules is that, as unfeminist as it sounds, a woman should do absolutely nothing to start a relationship’
2) Wait at least four hours to answer a text
That’s the MINIMUM. ‘The older you are, the longer you should wait’
3) Don’t answer after midnight
‘Part of The Rules is about teaching men to respect you – and that means setting boundaries’
4) Keep emails brief and never email first
‘Long and/or frequent emails are a big turn-off… Leave him wanting more’
5) Facebook rules
‘Never send a friend request to a man you like’
6) Online dating rules
‘There are only two mistakes you can make. The first is not to try it. The second is to initiate contact’
7) Dealing with rejection
‘NEVER write angry texts, emails, posts or tweets in retaliation. Your best move is de-friend, unfollow, block and delete’
So how is everyone doing?
Well not too well according to a survey by ‘My Single Friend’ – the online dating site launched by Sarah Beeney in 2005, as 79% of women are now happy to make the first move with a man online and have responded ‘why wait?’. With only 21% never making the first move with a man.
With regards to text messaging, an encouraging 71% wait at least half an hour to respond but only 10% wait the recommended 4 hours. 29% respond immediately, which is polite but not a successful strategy in the dating game we are told.
Controversially Facebook stalking is becoming an increasingly popular way of researching potential dates and 65% of respondents did admit to using the social networking site to check out their potential date first.
But the big one that most people agreed on is dealing with date breakers and handling those people who have let you down by cancelling. Here the advice is if someone cancels twice, then that’s it – block them, unfollow them, delete them as a friend or completely, as 2 chances are more than enough. And a massive 86% agreed with that.
Obviously The New Rules is aimed at women – so gentlemen, you have been warned!
Want to read more?
The New Rules is available through Amazon…