Our Dating Safety Campaign Launch
Searchmate Ltd is delighted to support the Dating Agency Association’s Dating Safely Campaign launch, it is especially appropriate with today being St Valentine’s Day, which has been associated with love and romance now for many centuries. Finding new partners should be fun and part of an exciting journey that you take within your life, it is however important to take steps to ensure you stay safe, both your personal safety but also safety from scammers and online dating fraudsters. Searchmate announces our Dating Safely Campaign launch and fully supports the efforts that the Dating Agency Association have taken to highlight safer dating. Here is their press release:
Industry Body for UK Dating Agencies Announces Launch of National Dating Safely Campaign
Campaign Set to Save Lives Will ‘Go Live’ on 13th February 2017.
13th February 2017 – The industry body for UK dating agencies, The Dating Agency Association, has announced that its national Dating Safely Campaign will go live on February 13th, 2017, providing free information to single people, and clear professional guidelines to dating agencies, in order to promote a cultural shift in the way we think about personal safety.
On the 15th January 2017, eighteen year old, Leonne Weeks – ‘a quiet girl, who wouldn’t hurt anybody’ – was found dead in an isolated pathway in Rotherham, South Yorks. Police are scouring social media for clues after friends said that Leanne had gone to meet a man from a dating site. A teenage boy has been charged with her murder.
While Leonne’s devastated family await answers, this young woman’s death is a stark reminder of how meeting strangers online has become commonplace within our society. Men and women of all ages are putting themselves at risk every day across the UK as a result of new and dangerous attitudes to dating.
In the tragic case of Usha Patel – a forty-four year old mother who was brutally murdered by a man she invited to her home – having connected via an online dating agency – Judge Rebecca Poulet QC said: “In my assessment, this case is a stark warning to anyone who plans to meet someone following limited internet contact. That meeting must take place in a public place until one person feels they know something of the other.”
Usha Patel’s five-year-old son discovered his mother’s body the morning after the vicious and bloody attack, having been left alone with her overnight. Judge Rebecca Poulet concluded – “She (Patel) was clearly anxious to meet a new partner, but she paid for this invitation with her life.”
The Dating Agency Association has set out clear guidelines for both single people, and dating agencies across the country, to ensure that the very human desire to find love no longer leaves single people vulnerable to exploitation and violence.
Dating Expert and Self-Help author, Trelawney Kerrigan, has worked closely with The Dating Agency Association, safety professionals, UK charities, and a diverse group of single people, to devise a set of simple guidelines aimed at saving lives. The Dating Safely Guidelines handbook can be downloaded free of charge via the Dating Agency Association website www.datingagencyassociation.org.uk
A hard copy of the handbook can also be requested via the website.
Trelawney Kerrigan said: “The frightening conclusion to my research is that the anonymity of dating apps and online sites has bought with it increasingly dangerous attitudes towards meeting complete strangers in isolated settings – blinded by the instant intimacy of online communication. Importantly this is not a behaviour limited to young people: men and women of all ages are trading the basic safeguarding of their lives for instant gratification.”
Tina Wallace, the Chief Executive of the Dating Agency Association, is thrilled that all Dating Agency Association member agencies must now commit to implementing clear policies and procedures that promote a safe and transparent environment on behalf of their clients. Tina Wallace said: “Our Dating Safely Guidelines handbook provides simple common sense advice to single people, ensuring that they consider their own well being and put personal safety first when seeking a relationship.
For those hoping to attract love in 2017, the simple practice of giving gratitude could boost your desirability to others by around 25 per cent. This fact was reported by one of the world’s most respected experts on gratitude, Robert Emmons, phD, in his book “Thanks! How The New Science of Gratitude Can Make You Happier” Let’s look at how you can find love in 2017 by giving great gratitude.
People who regularly give gratitude experience increased levels of positive emotions. They sleep better. Express more compassion and kindness. Feel more alive. We don’t need science to tell us that these are the kind of people others love to be around.
The key to giving good gratitude is remembering to be thankful for life’s small blessings. Momentous occasions are wonderful, but it’s by noticing the little details that we really bring change. Sharing a smile with a stranger. Sipping a Gingerbread latte on the way to work. Waking up to sunshine streaming through the blinds.
Keeping a Gratitude Journal:
By taking the simple measure of keeping a Gratitude Journal, it’s possible to significantly raise our levels of happiness and well being. Notice the small details of each day that made you smile. Note them down.
Making a Gratitude Jar:
Write special moments on tiny pieces of paper and fold them into a Gratitude Jar. Next New Year’s Eve, pour out the jar and look back on all of those lovely memories.
Write a Gratitude Letter:
Let the people you love know how much you mean to them. Write down the little things they do that make such a difference to your life. Use good old fashioned paper and ink. Create a timeless memory of your appreciation.
365 Thank You Notes:
In her blog Daring To Live Fully ,Marelisa Fabrega writes about a man named John Kralik. Kralik made a New Year’s resolution to write 365 thank you notes, one for each day of the year. He spent an entire year thanking the people in his life – from his daughter’s teacher, to his coffee barista. By the close of the year, Kralik felt that his life had been transformed.
You really can find love in 2017 by giving great gratitude!
We can help you find the perfect partner to share this fantastic new year with. Call us for an informal chat on 0800 6444160 to see how our Personal Matchmakers can help.
While others pledge to lose weight or give up smoking, why not think about making
love your New Year’s Resolution?
In order to truly experience a rewarding relationship, couples have to commit to making love last. Within the first few days and weeks of a relationship, it’s relatively easy to generate feelings of excitement and wonder. However, around the six month period, the initial spark starts to feel as though it’s waning. Couples start to ask themselves – ‘Is this going anywhere?’
For those who are unwilling to recognise the commitment and effort a truly wonderful relationship requires, the answer is often a resounding ‘No!’
The good news is, for couples who are willing to make love a priority within their lives, a whole new relationship dynamic awaits.
Here are some suggestions for making your love last in 2017:
Keep the chemicals of love fizzing : Oxytocin is the hormone released via physical closeness and touching. It’s responsible for much of that feel-good emotional closeness. Studies show that a man’s level of oxytocin goes up by 500 per cent after making love. Make time to be physically and emotionally close. Remember the early days when just looking at each other felt like the most wonderful way to spend an hour or so? Keep up that adorable eye contact!
Do something thoughtful every day : Show your partner that he or she is special to you at least once a day with a thoughtful gesture. It could be as simple as slipping an I Love You note into a coat pocket on a rainy morning, or as grand as organising a surprise date at a favourite restaurant.
Be kinder and more forgiving to yourself : The better you feel about yourself, the easier it will be for love to flow around you. Allow yourself to be fully present in the moment, free of self doubt or resentment. For more about letting go visit tinybuddha.com or check here for some helpful tips: how-to-meditate.org
Make time to play together : Your partner should feel like your best friend and playmate. Try new activities together. Laugh together. Be silly. Most of all, be yourself. Never take yourself too seriously with your partner. Be comfortable being honest, open and vulnerable together.
At Searchmate, we believe that making love a New Year’s Resolution is the key to lasting happiness in 2017!
As we head into November, the promise of cosy winter evenings spent getting to know a fabulous, new partner certainly compensates for the drop in temperatures outdoors! At Searchmate, we love to recommend hidden gems to our clients; after all, those first dates with someone special are memories you’ll treasure for a lifetime. Roaring fires, elegantly draped fairy lights and excellent home-cooked food make for the perfect date at one of our recommended romantic, country pubs.
Here are a few of our favourites:
The Halfway House, Kineton
The Halfway House is a warm and welcoming 17th Century Inn in the Cotswold hamlet of Kineton. Priding itself on home-cooked food and a unpretentious yet stylish vibe, The Halfway House is the perfect venue for an evening of conversation and laughter. For daytime dates, Sunday lunch here is to die for! Rumour has it that proprietor, Tanya, and her team serve the best roast in The Cotswolds.
The George, Shipston on Stour
Based in the traditional, market town of Shipston upon Stour, the George is an 18th century Townhouse with a stylish, modern feel. The venue has a spacious ground floor with cute hideaways, including The Parlour, The Garden Room, and The Pantry.
Food is sourced locally, and served with great pride – local farms are credited with much of the great produce. For those who are meeting for an initial coffee, there’s a gorgeous roaring fire and range of homemade snacks (the freshly baked sausage rolls with piccalilli are delicious!).
The Chequers, Chipping Norton
Located in fashionable Chipping Norton, The Chequers is thought to date back to the late 1500s. The main bar takes us back to a time of traditional pubs, with a fire blazing throughout winter, and the buzz of lively conversation. The restaurant was formerly the old courtyard, and is now a small, covered eating area with a reputation for excellent food. With the famous Chipping Norton Theatre next door, The Chequers is perfect for pre-show drinks.
www.chequers-pub.com
The Bell, Willersey
The Bell is a traditional Cotswold, country pub in the picture postcard village of Willersey. A warm welcome, real English ale and home-cooked food are always on the menu.
With some of Britain’s most beautiful town’s – Broadway, Chipping Campden and Stratford upon Avon – close by, The Bell, is the perfect starting point for exploring the area.
Don’t forget to let us know if you’ve enjoyed a perfect date at a romantic, country pub – we’d love to recommend the venue to our clients!
If you are looking for your perfect partner, call us on 0800 6444160 to see how our Personal Matchmakers can help.
Surviving Christmas as a Singleton
We have all seen Bridget Jones dreading the Christmas Party, faced with a room full of apparently happily married couples and the nosy relatives and family friends with their not at all subtle enquiries of, “Got a new man yet? You must be over old so and so by now!” Despite such gatherings giving us the impression that the whole world apart from ourselves is neatly paired off, bear in mind that official figures show that around 1/3rd of the UK population is currently single – that may be a minority but it is still an awful lot of people, in fact that’s over 20 million of us. So take heart, you are certainly not alone!
So how do you go about surviving Christmas as a Singleton? Firstly, look at all the positives. There is not the duty visit with in-laws to endure and you can relish pleasing yourself with how to best use your time. You can enjoy taking time to relax over the festive session and you can plan ahead to do activities that you know you will enjoy, without the necessity of having to fit around someone else’s priorities or schedule.
As regards surviving those parties that seem full of couples, remember that they did invite you so they do want you there, whether alone or not, you are very welcome. Keep that in mind and stand tall, dress your best and go in with confidence. Usually there is the option to take a friend along if that might help you feel more comfortable, if but so, ensure that it is someone who won’t take up all your time making sure that they are OK, after all, you need to enjoy the party too! If you think you might be asked awkward and personal questions about your love life, it may be useful to have an answer ready prepared and a plan as to how to move the conversation onto a topic you would prefer. You are entitled to your privacy and even very well meaning friends need to understand that.
You might want to be proactive and invite some friends round. Include some singles but don’t forget its fine to mix singles with couples, so invite who you enjoy the company of, rather than selecting people based on their relationship status. Make an effort to entertain and you will enjoy the occasion.
Another option is to consider offering some of your time to a charity over Christmas. There are many options for this which a surf of the net will reveal and giving of your time can be a great way of meeting new people whilst lifting your spirits and those you help in the process.
One more suggestion to surviving Christmas as a singleton is to look at taking a trip away, either in this country or to discover somewhere new overseas. There are singles breaks with activities through which you can make new friends and many of these are by no means all about dating. They can be really fun ways to enjoy social time with other like-minded single travellers.
If your thoughts are turning to being one of a couple rather than staying single and not having to go through the horrors of surviving Christmas as a singleton, you are very welcome to speak to a Membership Adviser at Searchmate, a leading professional Dating Agency offering a successful, personal and secure matchmaking service. Joining Searchmate’s membership could well see your options expanding in whole new and exciting directions, with the festive session in mind!
Want to know more? Our team of Membership Adviser’s are always happy to speak to you about joining Searchmate and to talk you through our membership options. Ring us from 9am until 9pm everyday apart from Christmas Day, Boxing Day and New Years Day on 0800 644 4160 or click here to complete our contact form.
Dating Safely With Searchmate
In an age where more and more people are dating and looking for partners. In a market place that has expanded exponentially since the launch of Match.Com. in the UK in 1998, it is very easy to get carried away and bitten by the dating bug. But please do it very carefully. Our new guide Dating Safely with Searchmate is a mine of information on how to best keep yourself safe when seeking new partners. Please see how you can obtain your own free advance copy later on in this article.
There are more than 1400 dating sites and dating agencies in the UK alone in a market that is approaching £1 billion per annum in revenue, but not everything in the garden is perfect with dating related crimes and dating fraud soaring too. Recently more than 54% of online daters felt they had been contacted by someone who had seriously misrepresented themselves online. In terms of the truthfulness of their profile, the age of their photos, their height and/or weight, their occupation or their marital/relationship status. As well as that 28% felt that they had been approached by someone who made them feel uncomfortable or had harassed them.
2016 will it be remembered for the wrong reasons?
For more and more people keeping safe in the search for new partners is becoming a really serious consideration. In 2016 alone we have seen a further murder involving people who met on Plenty of Fish and another involving Oasis, we have also witnessed the very high profile Match.Com rape trial. This was where their client Jason Lawrence was jailed for life at Derby Crown Court, for 6 rapes and an attempted rape.
With the trial of Stefano Brizzi. Who is alleged to have murdered and dismembered the body of a serving Police Officer Gordon Semple. Who he had met on a Dating App, due to start at the Old Bailey in London later this month. 2016 has been notable for many of the wrong reasons in the dating world and at Searchmate we are extremely keen to offer a safer, more confidential alternative to high profile online sites. Ensuring our members are dating safely and with confidence. With many online sites the client’s personal details and photographs are very high profile and extremely easily accessed by anyone who wishes, often non-members too. They can also often be easily found on Google and other search engines.
The launch of our own Dating Safely Campaign
Shortly in conjunction with our Regulator the Dating Agency Association, we are planning to launch our own Dating Safely Campaign. This is to help raise awareness of the dangers that are associated with online dating and promoting the safe, confidential and more professional alternative that joining Searchmate provides.
We will be providing a comprehensive guide to keeping safe whilst seeking new partners. This will be free to all that request it. For an advance copy please complete our Contact Form. And request one to be posted to you as soon as they have been published. Or telephone us for free on 0800 644 4160. and once again we will mail this to you as soon as it has been published. Let’s be careful out there and date safely.
